The alarm rang and rang and rang and rang.

And rang this morning.

Not mine.

My 11 year old's alarm. The one she set up on her iPod with that rotary phone ring.

It stopped.

10 minutes later, it resumed.

Followed by my son's alarm - the one that sounds like there is a nuclear attack from which we need to run for cover.

He, climbs down from his loft, heads for the bathroom, returns to his room, gets dressed, and comes down for breakfast. He is 8.

She, attempts snooze one more time.

This has been our first week of school. I've not entered their rooms to wake them - for my, ahem, "approach" for getting them out of bed always leads to heated words. And as I desire to create as tranquil a morning as I can . . . we've settled on having them set, and rise, to their own alarms.

11 and 8. Completely doable.

There are some other responsibilities I've given them, that I feel their ages can handle:

• Laundry: The 11 year old does hers from start to finish. My 8 year old puts away the clothes I fold for him.
• Dishwasher: While items are not always put away exactly where I would put them, I've given them this job, and they can handle it. Why balk at a pot put in the wrong place? Trying not to micro-manage here.
• Dogs: They walk them. They pick up the poop.
• Dinner Table: They set it.
• Bathroom: The 11 year gets that one.
• Walls and Molding: Those "magic eraser" sponges make this chore fun, fun, fun! (For me - 'cause I don't do it!)
• Lunches: They pack them. Under supervision. I'm uber-careful about what food we have in the house.

I am a HUGE fan of Stephanie O'Dea from 365 Days of Slow Cooking fame. But not only does she do magic with that thing, she also has some GREAT SUGGESTIONS for deciding on what chores children can handle at what ages.

Now that summer is over, I'm admitting that I'm a better mother all around  (not that I want to open THAT can of worms again), especially because my children take on the above responsibilities which frees me up to do my actual paying job, handle the bulk of the laundry, straighten up the house, organize our finances, grocery shop, run errands, and cook dinner . . . which, I know, I know, all of YOU do these things, too. I'm trying to "re-learn" how to cook from scratch, to help my family and more specifically, my daughter. So this is new learning curve for me as I work towards preparing real food and some gluten-free at that.

So, yeah, I need help.

They will do. Hired! (Albeit, without pay.)

What chores do your children complete around the home, and how old are your children?

 

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Joline Pinto Atkins is an actress who also uses the web as her world-wide stage and can also be found writing at The Cuppa Jo, and is the founder and a contributor at Daily Fast Fuel. Joline is wife to one (phew - that's good to know) and mother of two amazing children, aged 11 and 7, who are both named after authors. Addicted to fitness, she is an Independent Team Beachbody Coach and sweats out any daily angst by exercising and P90X'ing, and longs for good books, vats of coffee, and an endless supply of buffalo wings - which she will not share with you. So, please, do not ask.

 

 

At the age of 4 1/2, my energetic, inquisitive, enthusiastic, and confident pre-schooler disappeared.

Once game for everything, she feared even attending birthday parties. With her own friends. Her emotions were fragile. Tantrums and meltdowns like we had never experienced, would drop without warning. She was on edge. The little girl we knew was fading . . . the worry permeated our lives.

Perhaps you think this sounds normal for a 4-year old. It's just phase. "You just had a new baby!" This season will pass. Next month it will be something new.

Well, then there were the vacant eyes. Blue as all get out - but numb. The sparkle was gone. Glum, was the word we used to describe her.

Something was wrong.

We spent almost all of her kindergarten year trying to convince someone to believe us. "She's just adjusting. Don't worry." I would scream (inside) that I KNEW MY KID, but I just couldn't find anyone who would believe me - other than my family and close friends who knew my child since birth. They, too, saw the change. And didn't think I was crazy.

First grade came along, and she began to explain what she was feeling.

"All the thoughts stack up in my head. Up and up and up. Higher and higher. And they won't leave."

"I wish I had a key to unlock the lock on my forehead, open it up, and let my thoughts out."

"I'm nocturnal. I never shut off."

"I feel all this crummy stuff. Here." And she would point to her head.

NOW, I had their attention. I am thankful that her first grade teacher partnered with us to help find the right solutions and therapy for my girl. I just wanted her back.

She was diagnosed (after more than a month of testing - not just a trip to the family practitioner) with ADHD. Only, not the kind you automatically "know". She wasn't bouncing from seat to seat, unable to keep focus, doing poorly in school, or impulsive. No, hers had everything to do with an overstocked brain that needed relief. The overabundance of thoughts needed a heave-ho. And due to this build up of thoughts, she was now experiencing major social anxiety. She had developed a phobia about being around people - even familiar ones. Once, at an event, she remarked, "My body wants to do what everyone is doing, but my head is stopping me." WHERE WAS MY KID?!

That was first grade. Within one week of taking medication, my daughter returned. No hyperbole here. She was back. Her eyes had a fire in them once again. She was smiling. More sure of herself. Enjoying herself. Participating again. You will NEVER hear me judge another parent for choosing medication for their child.

She is now in 6th grade and has been on her the same dose of medication since 3rd grade. We're never had need to increase it. Only, with recent height and weight increases, and some "scatteredness" towards the end of the school year, we thought now (the summer) would be the best time to experiment with an increase in her dosage.

Only . . . within 2 hours of taking the increase, she went . . . glum. Solemn. Disappeared. I thought she was just in some tween slump, but again, she spoke up,

"I don't feel well. It's like, I'm sad. Only, I'm not. And it just kind of happened."

That was three weeks ago. I tried the medication for another week or so, but her reaction did not imporove. She was moody. Irritable. Sullen. So, I stopped giving it to her. I didn't want to lose her personality again. Instead, now that she's older, we had a huge talk about nutrition and how with healthier foods and the new addition of Omega 3 vitamins, we may be able to curb this sucker. But, it would involve sacrifice.  We are slowly removing the bulk (not all) of the gluten. Dyes and HFCS were removed years ago. Breakfast is protein. Lunches for school will be carefully packed for sustenance and endurance, for she herself "felt" a meltdown after having a bagel and potatoes on vacation. Her response to those foods was like a light-bulb on a dimmer switch - she slowly faded upon eating them. And we, my husband and I, witnessed her body go from energetic to complete slump within 30 minutes of downing the carbo-loaded meal. She said she hated that feeling. Food is supposed to make you feel good, right? Food is fuel. So, I'm thankful she's old enough to partner with me on this now. 

I know the medication helped when she was younger.

I also know certain foods effect her greatly. I am a HUGE believer that we do not give enough credit to how food can effect us - for good and for absolutely downright horrible. 

So, for us, right now, the course is nutrition and vitamins. Sure, that could change.

Has anyone else had this experience? Going from a medication that worked, to the SAME medication not working, to a change in nutrition and the addition of vitamins to help treat ADHD naturally???

 

---

Joline Pinto Atkins is an actress who also uses the web as her world-wide stage and can also be found writing at The Cuppa Jo, and is the founder and a contributor at Daily Fast Fuel. Joline is wife to one (phew - that's good to know) and mother of two amazing children, aged 11 and 7, who are both named after authors. Addicted to fitness, she is an Independent Team Beachbody Coach and sweats out any daily angst by exercising and P90X'ing, and longs for good books, vats of coffee, and an endless supply of buffalo wings - which she will not share with you. So, please, do not ask.

 

At the age of 4 1/2, my energetic, inquisitive, enthusiastic, and confident pre-schooler disappeared.

Once game for everything, she feared even attending birthday parties. With her own friends. Her emotions were fragile. Tantrums and meltdowns like we had never experienced, would drop without warning. She was on edge. The little girl we knew was fading . . . the worry permeated our lives.

Perhaps you think this sounds normal for a 4-year old. It's just phase. "You just had a new baby!" This season will pass. Next month it will be something new.

Well, then there were the vacant eyes. Blue as all get out - but numb. The sparkle was gone. Glum, was the word we used to describe her.

Something was wrong.

We spent almost all of her kindergarten year trying to convince someone to believe us. "She's just adjusting. Don't worry." I would scream (inside) that I KNEW MY KID, but I just couldn't find anyone who would believe me - other than my family and close friends who knew my child since birth. They, too, saw the change. And didn't think I was crazy.

First grade came along, and she began to explain what she was feeling.

"All the thoughts stack up in my head. Up and up and up. Higher and higher. And they won't leave."

"I wish I had a key to unlock the lock on my forehead, open it up, and let my thoughts out."

"I'm nocturnal. I never shut off."

"I feel all this crummy stuff. Here." And she would point to her head.

NOW, I had their attention. I am thankful that her first grade teacher partnered with us to help find the right solutions and therapy for my girl. I just wanted her back.

She was diagnosed (after more than a month of testing - not just a trip to the family practitioner) with ADHD. Only, not the kind you automatically "know". She wasn't bouncing from seat to seat, unable to keep focus, doing poorly in school, or impulsive. No, hers had everything to do with an overstocked brain that needed relief. The overabundance of thoughts needed a heave-ho. And due to this build up of thoughts, she was now experiencing major social anxiety. She had developed a phobia about being around people - even familiar ones. Once, at an event, she remarked, "My body wants to do what everyone is doing, but my head is stopping me." WHERE WAS MY KID?!

That was first grade. Within one week of taking medication, my daughter returned. No hyperbole here. She was back. Her eyes had a fire in them once again. She was smiling. More sure of herself. Enjoying herself. Participating again. You will NEVER hear me judge another parent for choosing medication for their child.

She is now in 6th grade and has been on her the same dose of medication since 3rd grade. We're never had need to increase it. Only, with recent height and weight increases, and some "scatteredness" towards the end of the school year, we thought now (the summer) would be the best time to experiment with an increase in her dosage.

Only . . . within 2 hours of taking the increase, she went . . . glum. Solemn. Disappeared. I thought she was just in some tween slump, but again, she spoke up,

"I don't feel well. It's like, I'm sad. Only, I'm not. And it just kind of happened."

That was three weeks ago. I tried the medication for another week or so, but her reaction did not imporove. She was moody. Irritable. Sullen. So, I stopped giving it to her. I didn't want to lose her personality again. Instead, now that she's older, we had a huge talk about nutrition and how with healthier foods and the new addition of Omega 3 vitamins, we may be able to curb this sucker. But, it would involve sacrifice.  We are slowly removing the bulk (not all) of the gluten. Dyes and HFCS were removed years ago. Breakfast is protein. Lunches for school will be carefully packed for sustenance and endurance, for she herself "felt" a meltdown after having a bagel and potatoes on vacation. Her response to those foods was like a light-bulb on a dimmer switch - she slowly faded upon eating them. And we, my husband and I, witnessed her body go from energetic to complete slump within 30 minutes of downing the carbo-loaded meal. She said she hated that feeling. Food is supposed to make you feel good, right? Food is fuel. So, I'm thankful she's old enough to partner with me on this now. 

I know the medication helped when she was younger.

I also know certain foods effect her greatly. I am a HUGE believer that we do not give enough credit to how food can effect us - for good and for absolutely downright horrible. 

So, for us, right now, the course is nutrition and vitamins. Sure, that could change.

Has anyone else had this experience? Going from a medication that worked, to the SAME medication not working, to a change in nutrition and the addition of vitamins to help treat ADHD naturally???

 

---

Joline Pinto Atkins is an actress who also uses the web as her world-wide stage and can also be found writing at The Cuppa Jo, and is the founder and a contributor at Daily Fast Fuel. Joline is wife to one (phew - that's good to know) and mother of two amazing children, aged 11 and 7, who are both named after authors. Addicted to fitness, she is an Independent Team Beachbody Coach and sweats out any daily angst by exercising and P90X'ing, and longs for good books, vats of coffee, and an endless supply of buffalo wings - which she will not share with you. So, please, do not ask.

 

It's true.

While I don't HATE summer, 'cause I really don't hate anything (except maybe cancer and other death-wielding evils), I honestly do not like it.

"Are you having a relaxing summer?"

"What did you do this summer?"

"Don't you love the hazy, lazy days of summer?"

My answers?

No.

The same stuff I do every other season, only with trips thrown in, lack of a solid schedule, a TON more juggling, and dirty feet.

No.

Thankfully, right now, my kids are upstairs listening to a book on CD - part of the designated "down time" that as a rule, must be built into everyday. See, thing is, I have a job. And my job is done from home (yes - a nice perk). And while during the school year I have from 9-3 to do that job, during the summer, the workload does not change. The number of people home during the day does. Which affects my ability to get concentrated time. I actually have to work harder in order for things to be easier.

Does that make sense?

Add to that the heat, late nights thanks to the Olympics, and an off-kilter schedule and you've got one irritable mama.

Summer exhausts me.

I really enjoy my children. I actually think they are super cool kids. So before someone remarks, "Cherish the time with your kids!", that's not the point I'm trying to make. I DO cherish the time and have enjoyed taking them on a trip to Washintong D.C. and another coming up next week,  and to Karate, the pool, various camps/activities here and there throughout the summer, having their friends over during the day, shuttling them to some fantastic church events  - it's all GOOD.

And because I WANT these things for them, we've worked them in to our summer.

But that doesn't change what I must complete during the day so that we can afford for my 11 year old to get braces in January (Yeah!). Someone has to pay for that. And while I do make her save up for many things, I think braces are my responsibility ;-).

So, yeah. I'm tired.

And I need a vacation. During a different season, please.

I'm ready for Fall.

Herein lies my confession.

Summer is my LEAST favorite season. Perhaps for many it is casual, relaxed, and a nice "break" during the year. Over here, we experience the direct opposite.

What is your favorite season?

What is your least favorite season?

---

 

Joline Pinto Atkins is an actress who also uses the web as her world-wide stage and can also be found writing at The Cuppa Jo, and is the founder and a contributor at Daily Fast Fuel. Joline is wife to one (phew - that's good to know) and mother of two amazing children, aged 11 and 7, who are both named after authors. Addicted to fitness, she is an Independent Team Beachbody Coach and sweats out any daily angst by exercising and P90X'ing, and longs for good books, vats of coffee, and an endless supply of buffalo wings - which she will not share with you. So, please, do not ask.