Recently, I somehow got myself involved in a conversation about parenthood with two, 23-year-old-guys who have no children.

At first, I wanted to immediately break and reverse myself right on outta there (because I was feeling OLD) until one sweetly asked, “is it tough being a parent?”

I answered honestly, “shhhhhhhhhhhhhyeah!”

Followed by, “if you’re not ready, take every possible step ever invented to avoid it. If you think you’re ready, think again.”

I proceeded to tell them that my husband and I were ready and having a kid almost knocked us on our butts. I know I’m not telling you guys anything new, but when I think about it, I can’t believe how hard this has been.

I’m BEGGING you not to see this as whining, and I could go on and on about how grateful I am for my sweet, beautiful, healthy boy, Lincoln, but you all know that I am (I hope). We all are grateful for our kids (right?), but this thang called parenthood is bananas!

I couldn’t explain to those guys the worry. I couldn’t describe the feeling of helplessness when Lincoln gets hurt or is sick. I could not put into words how much was ahead of me that I’d have to deal with and how terrifying it was. The decisions that need to be made every day, the insecurity, the waiting, the rushing, that feeling in the pit of your stomach – I couldn’t stress how much is unknown until you’re in it.

On the flip side, all the good stuff is by far as amazing and cancels out all that other stuff up there. I didn’t tell them that, though. I save that info for my first-time and scared preggo friends. They need to know how good it all really is.

Erin Hill is a first-time mom to Lincoln, who was born in January 2010. She's learning as she goes and is experiencing everything a new mom goes through while seeing the humor, irony, and enjoyment in her adventures.

Erin is a full-time technical writer and features freelance writer in her "spare time." She lives in Plum with Lincoln, her husband, Adam, their dog, Roxie, and five (yes, five) cats, Nirvana, Gary Roberts, Elvis, Talbot and Forrest.

Like most new parents, when Lincoln was a baby, we took a lot of pictures of him. He’d just sit there, being cute and “pose.” We have so many cute pictures.

These days, I get five to 10 a week on my iPhone and most are blurry.

He’s two, almost three, and doesn’t sit still. He makes funny faces and does an immeasurable about of picture-worthy things, but doesn’t hold anything long enough for me to capture it forever on my Canon. Also, when we’re participating in something monumental, like trick-or-treating, or at and event or something like that, I’d like to be there. When I’ve got the camera in my hand and I’m snapping away, I feel like I’m missing something. Maybe I can’t do two things at once like that.

I don’t feel so bad now about this, but will I later?

Recently, I went through my parents’ photo collection. There are significant gaps, both in their lives and the lives of my brother and me. Where are all the Halloweens, the Christmases, the photos of my first bike ride or my brother on the skateboard I remember him loving so much? At first, I was sad. We really had minimal record of things I couldn’t remember.  Then, I thought, we probably don’t have these pictures because my parents were helping us open gifts or waiting to catch me or my brother when we fell.

I look through Facebook and everyone seems to have such nice memories captured that I have maybe three photos of. Theirs are all fancy and look professional and mine are blurry or the back of Linc’s head.

Should I put more effort into taking pictures? Should I not feel like I’m not in the moment being behind the camera? I don’t look at other people and thing they’re missing something taking a million pictures so why do I feel that way about myself?

Do you take a lot of pictures?

This was his first year at his new school for Halloween and since his school is in a vocational school, the kids get to trick-or-treat to the classrooms and collect goodies. The kids also had a party that parents could choose to send something in for. I have to say I’m pretty impressed with Lincoln’s haul.

I worried that all those classrooms and treats from his friends would equal a big load of candy with a sprinkle of things like crackers and pretzels. Not that I assume people don't want to hand out non-candy things, but I just figured Halloween is a candy-infused holiday so that's what he'd get. No biggie. Whatever.

Look at that picture over there, though – a tiny pile of candy (right) and several packages of pretzels, fruit snacks, animal crackers, Annie’s Organic grahams, a cereal bar, applesauce and, my most favorite, and orange. An orange!! I love it! Sure, the fruit snack and animal crackers may be just as unhealthy as the candy, but people were thinking outside of the box here.

I have to find out who sent the oranges in. He/she is my soul sister/brother.

I sent in these (mandarin oranges with jack-o-lantern faces drawn on them. Thank you, Pinterest):

I get made fun of by my friends a lot for the stuff I send in with Lincoln for occasions such as this and when he’s responsible for bringing in snacks. I get told Lincoln will be the “weird” kid in class because he's taking in whole wheat banana bread or pretzels and homemade applesauce. I may get made fun of by the other parents there, too, but I don’t know. I don’t really care. I don’t think “snacks” or “treats” mean candy or chips, and it seems like a lot of people don’t think that either. YAY!

Lincoln will get to eat his Halloween candy, don’t worry. I’m just glad he doesn’t have a whole bunch to choose from.

Have you ever sent in or given something on the healthy side as a treat/snack for your kids and their friends? Are you giving out candy or something else this year?

I’m not into making my kid do stuff (except the things you have to do to live and be nice to people). My goal is to have him try, and if he’s not into it, leave it at that.

This is difficult. I'm not trying to raise a slacker. There’s a fine line between him trying and genuinely not liking it and letting him give up. Plus, he’s only two (almost three). How do I figure out if he’s just being two?

I do not want him to give up. He is two, but I think you can teach any aged kid a lesson – it’s all in the approach and understanding that they might not get it the first, second, or tenth time you tell them. Also, I do believe he knows what he wants (and doesn’t want) to do. He’s human!

My brother and I were both made to do stuff – I was in dance classes about 10 years too long, and he still can’t have anyone tell him what to do. These are our issues, but it’s an experience that has me worried about forcing rather than guiding.

Last month Lincoln participated in a tumbling class one day a week for two weeks. He rolled, cartwheeled, he smiled, he was proud. The third week, he wasn’t into it so we sat to the side and watched the other kids participate. I encouraged him a few times to go try the new stuff the kids were doing or further perfect a move he’d done the week before, but he wasn’t having it. He said he wanted to watch. He was coming off an illness so I thought that’s what he needed at the time – to relax and observe.

The next week, he wanted to sit and watch again. I told him we weren’t there to watch, he was there to tumble, and if he didn’t want to, we’d leave and try it again another time. He stood there, looked at the kids, looked back at me and said “I wanna go home.” After confirming that’s what he wanted to do and really feeling like he had made a decision, we left. That was that. He didn’t cry or even mention it after.

I’m cool with it.

I will ask him again in January if he wants to go back. In the future, I’ll ask him if he wants to play baseball, do karate, play an instrument, etc. I intend to make sure he knows what’s available to him in this world and have him pick. However, “nothing” is not an option. I will make him do something.

How do you encourage your kids to participate in something? What’s your limit on how long you have them in an activity they say they don’t like before taking them out?

Erin Hill is a first-time mom to Lincoln, who was born in January 2010. She's learning as she goes and is experiencing everything a new mom goes through while seeing the humor, irony, and enjoyment in her adventures.

Erin is a full-time technical writer, a freelancer for Patch, and co-creator and blogger at SlimSavers.com. She lives in Plum with Lincoln, her husband, Adam, their dog, Roxie, and five (yes, five) cats, Nirvana, Gary Roberts, Elvis, Talbot and Forrest. (Anyone want a cat?)