Parents give the term "Going Green" a whole new meaning
By Amanda Gillooly
Move over prescription sedatives, Mary Jane is mother’s
newest little helper.
Call them what you will – stiletto stoners, marijuana mamas,
or pot parents, but national surveys overwhelmingly agree: Whatever the nickname,
plenty of American parents are going green.
A recent nation-wide survey conducted by Web site Chikii.com
asked women between the ages of 25 and 60 about their toking habits. More than
half those women said they used pot at least 10 times per year, while 27
percent indicated they smoked up between once and seven times a week.
Almost 80 percent of those women said they know other women
who get high regularly.
And Pittsburgh parents are no different. Plenty of moms and
dads in the Golden Triangle admit they still enjoy rocking the proverbial
ganja.
Take Mark and Pearl of Forrest Hills. (last names have been omitted to protect privacy)
Mark, 28, is an administrator in the higher education sector, while his wife, 32, manages a prominent retail store. Both say
they smoke marijuana to help quell the stresses of work and life – which
includes rearing three kids under the age of 10.
Admittedly, Pearl is the less frequent pot smoker. More of a
social drinker, she never even tried the leafy green stuff until she married
Mark more than six years ago. These days Pearl takes a puff or two when
migraine pain strikes. In their household, Mark mostly controls the cannabis. He
buys it and keeps it under lock and key somewhere the kids don’t have access. And he is the one who mostly sneaks out to the garage to take
a puff or two to help him better deal with the stresses of being dad.
“It helps shut out some of the other noise,” Mark said. “I
find that I am more relaxed and less self-conscious.”
That calmer state of mind, he said, leads to long games of "Chutes and
Ladders", complete with silly voices that make the kids laugh those
Saturdays when the quartet are home while Pearl drives the family car to work.
And plenty of his friends are fine with his relationship
with Mary Jane. Not only do the majority of his friends still smoke, but he
and Pearl have smoked with their oldest daughter’s schoolmates’ parents.
“I have imbibed with other parents at their houses,” he said.
“Most people I know either smoke, have smoked and are cool with it or have a
spouse that smokes.”
Tara, 24, of Sturgeon, agreed.
The proud mother of a dusty blonde-haired baby girl said she
smokes almost every day – and knows plenty of her friends who also like to
puff, puff then pass.
Like Mark, Tara said she has been getting high since she was
in her mid-teens and considers marijuana use as more of a lifestyle than stress
reliever.
Although she doesn’t deny that smoking a bowl on the porch
while her daughter naps contently inside does help take the edge off.
Like when the two-year-old tyke makes a mess. Or embarks on a teething-related tantrum.
“It helps me relax and get into ‘mommy mode’ more easily,”
Tara, a stay-at-home mom, said.
None of this is shocking to Dr. John Massella, regional
program director at Gateway Rehabilitation Center, a substance abuse treatment
provider based in Beaver County. He said it seems like cannabis is going the way of bell
bottoms and other ‘60s-chic trends: It is regaining its popularity.
Massella said Gateway has experienced somewhat of an influx
of people who meet criteria for cannabis dependence – and that the stories he
has heard from the out-patient clients seeking its services might surprise
mainstream America. He attributes some of the increase to the fact that today’s
young parents “grew up” with marijuana and don’t see its use as a problem.
“It’s like they are turning back to an old friend they used
to know in high school,” Massella said.
Many of these parents consider marijuana a way of life. And
it often isn’t long before they start smoking in front of their kids. And a few
years after that, the camaraderie often advances a step further.
“Sooner or later…the kids will come home from college and
before you know it mom and dad will be rolling a fatty with them,” he said.
Massella said other clients have confided that they purchase
weed for their kids, and even let them smoke in the house.
“I have parents who will say, ‘At least I know they are
safe,’” he said.
This trend is disturbing to Massella on several levels.
“There is a perception that marijuana is a harmless drug,
and that is just not the case,” he said, adding that the pot potency has
increased in the past three decades.
Because the progression of cannabis dependence is less
aggressive than some other drugs, Massella said it is easy for users tend to
“minimize the problem.”
Aside from the inherent respiratory risks involved with
smoking weed, it can also cause gross changes in personality and can impact
motivation. It can also cause something known as rebound anxiety – when all the
worries the smoker was trying to sedate come back even more strongly once the
high wears off.
For him, the bottom line is simple: “Its impact on the brain
is still in question,” Massella said. “It is still someone turning to something
outside themselves on their own. We would never do back surgery or pull a tooth
on our own. It’s the same thing.”
He said parents who smoke to help relieve stress should seek
more appropriate means of release, and he suggests turning toward a family
doctor or licensed therapist. And for those who consider marijuana part of
their lifestyle, he said he “can’t ignore” that these parents are breaking the
law when they buy, sell and smoke weed.
That reality is becoming clearer to Catherine, a 25-year-old
wife and mother who lives in Robinson Township. While she has smoked for several years – both out of
pleasure and to deal with parenting stress – she sees marijuana-less days in
her future.
“These days I am all about my family,” Catherine, a waitress
and mom to a 3-year-old son said. “When we have our second baby, I think I’m
not going to do it at all.”
She admits that she enjoys how smoking “helps calm her
nerves” but said it is a risk she is more reticent to take these days. And she
is growing tired of the “lazy mode” she said weed puts her in. But most of all, she said she doesn’t want her son to ever
see her smoking or even understand what it is.
“I’m getting to the point where I don’t even want to do it
anymore.”
Amanda Gillooly is a freelance writer in the Pittsburgh region. She can be reached at amandabgillooly@gmail.com
Posted
Oct 08 2009, 03:40 PM
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